For Men
1- Tank Tops: Unless you are on the basketball court, then this is the number one crime in fashion.
Let me put it in plain English, IT IS RUDE TO SIT IN A RESTAURANT WEARING A TANK TOP!! Noone wants to look at or sit near
a sweaty guy with armpit sweat and hair hanging out. Noone cares about your "cool looking" tattoo's. It's just plain rude,
it's not cool looking and women do not find this attractive.
2- Body Hair: There is really no need for it. Women find excessive body hair on a man just plain
creepy. The 70's were a long time ago. It's time to shave your way into the new millenium. Shoulder hair, back hair, neck
hair, armpit hair...it's all just scary. If you don't feel like going for a wax, then a simple shave with a razor will suffice.
Once before shorts and t-shirt weather arrives will probably be enough for the season.
3- Sports Jerseys: Maybe it's appropriate for those sunday's on the couch in front of the TV, but
not in a club when you're trying like Hell to impress a woman. We are only laughing our asses off when a guy shows up to a
social event such as a dance or a date wearing a numbered Patriots jersey or a tee-shirt with a New Jersey Nets Tank top over
it. Is this your idea of getting dressed up? Shame on you.
4- Wrinkled clothing: Does anyone own an iron anymore? Didn't your mother ever teach you to iron
your own clothes? I can't tell you how many first dates I've been on and went home dissapointed due to the fact that the guy
showed up with a wrinkled shirt or pants that looked like he pulled them out of a hamper 10 minutes before we met. Buying
something off the rack in a store before going out doesn't count either.
5- Hats: Just don't wear them. Wearing a ballcap indoors is very rude. I'm not saying we need to
go back to covered wagon times when a man removes his hat in the presence of a woman, but for God Sakes, take the hat off
when your dining in a restaurant. Hats are ok for working if needed, the beach (recommended) or if you are an actual baseball
player. (*This is also true for stocking caps, kangols and scally caps)
For Women
1- Ass crack thong exposure- Look,...Thongs are the best thing ever invented. They
are comfortable, they look sexy, they feel sexy...but there is a limit in question. Think of it as the now you see it and
now you don't factor. Don't walk around everywhere saying, HEY LOOK, HERE IS MY THONG! STARE AT MY ASS! SERIOUSLY, CHECK IT
OUT!. A thong looks sexy on a girl when she bends over to look in her purse or to admire a baby in a carriage. NOT and I stress
NOT, when you are just randomly staning in line, or walking through a mall or walking to your next class. It's trashy looking.
Let there be a little bit of mystery in your trunk.
2- Excessive jewelry- OK, what is up with the girls who wear 15 chains around their neck, 10 rings,
8 piercings in each ear, nose ring, belly chain, eyebrow rings....you look like you tripped and fell into a tackle box. It
is very trashy looking and most of the time, the white girl ghetto fabulous look just doesn't work.
3- The jelly shirts...oops, I meant belly shirts- Listen, we all can't have abs of steel like Gwen
Stefani and Fergie of Black Eyed Peas. Those of us who do, more power to you. But those of us who don't , need to show a little
more discretion in our dressing agenda. Study the laws of psysics, then when you do, you should have figured out that a size
15 doesn't look healthy in a size 4. That's all I'm going to say on this matter.
4- Dress your age- Just the other day I was at the gas station and I saw a woman, in her 40's,
with her 2 teenage daughters. Let's just say that if this was my mother, I would have hitch hiked home rather than be seen
with her. It's the middle of February in New England and she is walking around in gap sweatshirt, cut to her belly button,
tight tight tight ass jeans, bracelets, anklets, the "cool" lower back tattoo, etc. It was pathetic, and the sad part was,
her girls looked just like her. I know that I sound all ultra conservative, but I'm not. I do believe though, that people
should be a bit more conservative in their style. Less is more.
5- Last but not least, Bright red lipstick while buying bread at the supermarket- There is a time
and a place for everything. I'm not going to tell anyone how to live their life behind their bedroom doors, but for God's
sake, lose the excessive makeup. Getting all dolled up before 10PM on any given day is just trashy. Again, less is definitely
more.
