2- You think it is your God given right to cut someone off in traffic!

 

3- You think there are only 25 letters in the alphabet (What's an R ?)

 

4- You think 3 straight days of 90 degrees is a heat wave.

 

5- All your Pets are named after Celtic Hall of Famers. ( by the way, Ocean Views own Rob Watts has a dog named KC )

 

6- You refer to 6 inches of snow as a dusting.

 

7- Just hearing the words New York puts you in an angry frenzy.

 

8- You don't think you have an attitude.

 

9- You Knew the significance of 1918.

 

10- Everything in town is a 5 minute walk.

 

11- When out of town, you think the natives of the area you're visiting are all Whacked.

 

12- You still can't watch highlights from game 6 of the 1986 world series.

 

13- You have no idea what the word compromise means.

 

14- You believe using your blinker in the car is a sign of weakness.

 

15- You don't realize that you talk twice as fast as everyone else in America.

 

16- You're anal, neurotic, spasmatic and stubborn.

 

17- You think if someone is nice to you, they must want something or are from out of town.

 

18- Your favorite adjective is "Wicked."

 

19- You think 63 degree ocean water is warm.

 

20- You think that the Kennedy's are missunderstood.

 

1- You'll know who the cahdnal is, how to take the T to JP and what the blinking red light atop the old Hancock building means during the summer.

 

2- And if your smaht, you'll know how not to get cahded at the packie.

 

 

1- We don't speak English. We speak whatever they brought over here from East Anglia in 1630.

 

2- The Bawstin accent is basically the broad A and the dropped R.

 

3- For the broad A, just open your mouth and say AHHH like the docta says.

 

4- So car is cah, park is pahk.

 

 

1- You wear a Harvard sweatshirt.

 

2- You cross at a crosswalk.

 

3- You ask directions to Cheers.

 

4- You order a grinder and a pop.

 

5- You actually pronounce it Worcester.

 

6- You walk the freedom trail.

 

7- You call it Copely Square.

 

8- You go to B.U. or Babson.

 

 

Boston is a mishmosh of 17th century cow paths and 19th century landfills penned in by water. You know "one if by land two if by sea."

 

Charlestown? Cahn't get theyah from heah.

 

And which Warren Street do you want? We have 3 of them, plus 3 Warren Avenues, 3 Warren Squares, A Warren Park and a Warren Place.

 

Pay no attention to street names. There's no school on scool street, no court on court street, no dock in dock square and no water on water street.

 

Back Bay streets are in alphabetical order. Arlington, Berkeley, Clarendon, Dartmouth, etc.....

 

South Boston streets are the same. A, B, C, D, E, etc...

 

If streets are named after trees (walnut, chestnut, cedar) you're on Beacon Hill. If they are named after poets, you're in Wellesley.

 

Dot is Dorchester, Rozzie is Roslindale, JP is Jamaica Plain.

 

Readville doesn't exist.

 

 

Southie is South Boston. The South End is the South End.

The North End is east of the West End. The West End does not exist anymore, a guy named Rappaport got rid of it one night. Eastie is East Boston. The East End is Boston Harbor.

 

 

Boston Creme pie is a cake.

 

Frappes have ice cream, milk shakes don't.

 

Chowdah does not come with tomatoes

 

Kelly's Roast Beef doesn't just sell Roast Beef.

 

Soda is a club soda. Pop is dad.If it's fizzy and flavored, it's called tonic.

 

When we mean tonic water, we say tonic water.

 

Scrod is whatever they tell you it is, ususally fish. If you paid more than 6 dollars a pound, you got scrod.

 

They're hot dogs. Franks were people who lived in France in the ninth century.

 

 

Don't call it Beantown.

 

Don't pahk your cah in Hahvad Yahd. They'll tow it to Meffa.

 

Don't swim in the charles, no matter what our city officials tell ya.

 

Don't sleep in the Common.

 

Don't wear orange in Southie on St. Patrick's Day.

 

Don't call our Mayah Mumbles, he hates that.

 

Don't ask what she's majoring in....You don't care.

 

 

There are 2 state houses, 2 city halls, 2 courthouses, 2 Handcock Buildings. There is also a Boston Latin School and a Boston Latin academy. How should we know which one you mean??

 

Route 128 is also 95. 128 is also 93. 93 north sometimes goes south and 93 south sometimes goes north. For example; Route 128 south is also 95 south but 93 north and route 128 north is also 95 north but 93 south. Got it?

 

It's the Sox, the Pats, The Celts , the Broons.

 

The Harvard bridge goes to MIT. It's measured in "smoots."

 

Johnson  should never have hit for Willoughby.

 

Buckner should never have been in the game during the 9th.

 

The subway don't run all night. This ain't NooYawk.

 

 

1- When on a one way street, stay to the right to allow oncoming traffic to pass.

 

2- Never, EVER, stop for a pedestrian unless he flings himself under the wheels of your car.

 

3- The first parking space you see will be the last parking space you see. Grab it.

 

4- Double park in the North End of Boston and Southie, unless triple parking is available.

 

5- Learn to swerve abruptly. Boston is the home of slalom driving thanks to the registry of motor vehicles, which puts potholes in key locations to test drivers reflexex and keep them on their toes.

 

6- Never get in the way of a car that needs extensive body work.

 

7- Always look both ways before running a red light.

 

8- Honk your horn the instant the light changes.

 

9- Breakdown lanes are not for breaking down, but for speeding. Especially during rush hour. Breakdown lanes may also end without warning causing traffic jams as people merge back in.

 

10- Never use directional signals when changing lanes. They only warn other drivers to speed up and not let you in. Why give them the upper hand??

 

11- Making eye contact revokes your right of way.

 

12- Never pass on the left when you can pass on the right.

 

13- Whenever possible, stop in the middle of a crosswalk to ensure inconveniencing as many pedestrians as possible. and if a pedestrian ahead of you steps in the road, speed up loudly and chase him back up to the curb. Pedestrians have no rights...........unless you live in the peoples republic of cambridge, then, step onto the crosswalk, look straight ahead as if there are no dangerous vehicles approaching that could cause death, and walk straight in front of the car as if you haven't a care in the world.